How long do you need to date somebody until it is acceptable to fart in their presence?
The real question is how long do you need to date them to dutch oven them?
DO NOT FUCK HIM ON MY BEAN BAG CHAIR
im just going to wait until i dont feel like the grim reaper is having sex with me
Seriously... Things should be way more awkward... The entire female half of the bridal party INCLUDING THE BRIDE blew me in high school....
My brain is foggy with friends reruns and him licking hummus off my tits.
Yes. I feel like complaining about sex all the time with a 21 year old might be punishable by death of the sex gods so I try not to
Sometimes I envy you, when I'm not praying for your soul.
My goal is to go an entire semester without cocaine. That's an adult goal right?
Almost bit the guy's hand who sits in front of me because he was stretching. That. Bored.
I've justified worse with less. I had sex with your brother because he was wearing a nice sweater
Just a heads up... Don't get high and attempt to do your own taxes
Will you bring a case of beer down to the hot tub? Me and Phil don't want to feel feelings anymore
Yeah we were on bar number 7 on our bike trail and you decided to steal my bike and we found you 20 minutes later eating Cheetos in the shallow end of your parents pool
he bit THROUGH my nipple
plus side, no need to pay for a piercing.
Whenever a guy asks me why I like weird sex stuff, I just answer, "Catholic School".
Randomize
