That was a long time ago. She needed the money.
We can't ever have kids because there's a chance that they'll end up just like us.
What can I expect? While all of my friends are getting married, all of his friends are tripping on robitussin
Just hit on a fat chick so shed buy me a drink. Then i walked away. Nice to see how the other half lives.
If he's dead I'm so gonna get the blame. I have his passport, keys and his tooth in my purse.
i am going to show so many millionaires my nipple
Currently emptying half-full wine bottles from fridge into my mouth and refilling with water for later. Drunk survivalist recycling!
He pulled his pants down and said blow me, while passing out on my bed. I then pulled his pants up as he continuously started moaning in the background.
I'm at this kids house trying to figure out if I pissed in his kitchen new years eve. Lmao, stop letting me drink.
I spent $31 at mcdonalds last night. Threw my nuggets all over the yard, ate them out of the snow, picked a fight about it, vomited, then passed out.
Naked.
I think he knows I took a picture of him. Why I don't get punched in the face more often is anyone's guess.
I called you daddy and let you stick things in my butt, I am a damn 11.
just move with us, we wanted to get a dog. youre kind of the same thing..
I think everyone at the office can tell I'm dehydrated
you mean still drunk
I've heard it both ways
I don't really want to explain what i mean by this so just answer yes or no. are 5 cows enough?
Randomize
