You're my little dorito
LETS GET FUCKED UP IN ONESIES TONIGHT.
I worry about you sometimes...
i have more money on itunes than i do in my bank account... college.
the only compliment i could think of for this chick was that she looked 'moderately attractive'
I think the best part was when you jumped over me naked.
Every time I drink before 5 somebody's pet dies
Stop drinking before 5
Easier said than done
Rule travel - in 2s or put an ankle monitor on me, and maybe a shock collar.
I saw a classic trojan enz laying on his desk. So he's probably not into the kinky shit.
I'm totally going to bang the cable guy tonight. I'm so pumped
my nose is crying tears of wow.
I blame everything on you. My broken heart, my fucked up liver and my twisted mind.
You are hungover. Your arguments are irrational an incoherent. We only played twice. Have some Gatorade and take a knee.
you had her IN YOUR BED NO PANTS AND YOU GAVE HER THW BOOT?!?!?!
Stage five clinger bro. had to go.
dude me and this dog are gonna go bond oon the tramplene with stromboli... i think everyone is staring at me... being this high is SO stressful
I’m not lawful evil! I do evil things because I want to, not because of the law
Randomize
