she likes to give head while listening to britney spears, getting blown by a girl with headphones on is a nice level of separation
No, she passed out instead. I have the worst luck, its like Jesus is mad at me for having the same birthday as him
he locked me out then poked me with a fork when i tried to get in through the window
We're attempting to get a tally of how may people puked last night...Please respond with your vomit status.
I'd rate him "doable" on a scale from "ew, run" to "you should've already fucked him".
That's about an "8" on normal scales.
My dad got me a charm braclet....his way of trying to support my gayness....
Seriously? You DON'T remember putting all those Swedish fish in the waffle iron b/c you wanted "One big Swedish fish?" That waffle iron was a wedding gift.
I just spent 20 mins in the shower washing n rewashing my body to get rid of stripper. I even loofa'd my face.
So I wore a corset to school. Fuck laundry.
My gynaecologist hit my g-spot today by accident and for some reason I went "at least someone found it" VERY AWKWARD
I hope to God it's not the new neighbors having sex, because what I'm hearing sounds like a mildly defective vuvuzela or a cow giving birth.
Plus, I have my cousin, the dominatrix, to help me out if things get out of hand
I think the moment she woke up butt naked on a mattress with her phone still on her face was the point she knew last night was fucked up
As a member of the kink community, I feel grossly misrepresented
Dude, the worst part is I can't even pretend it didn't happen because she posted a video of it on Facebook.
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