i hate when i ask a girl what she's being for halloween and the first word isn't "slutty"
Have you ever seen an entire lecture hall fist pump? It's magical.
you refused to come out of the bathroom until i asked you in spanish
He was standing in the front door with a kareoke machine yelling at the neighbors as the unloaded their van
I don't know where Tiffany is but I just saw her shoes in the bar lost and found
i shit in a pringles can and hid it somewhere in your house....happy hunting
Every single item that was in my fridge is now in my hot tub. Please help
woke up to find i out made out with his roommate before hooking up with him. breakfast was awkward to say the least
I think weed is turning my hair brown
Grilled cheese and shark week. Unemployment done right.
I had cheese pancakes which is pretty much just melting cheese in a frying pan and then eating it except youre in denial that your life is a wreck
You ask to touch his thighs ten times and called them magnificent.....need I say more
I literally am filling up a victoria's secret bag with stuff that would give my parents a heart attack to hide in my roommates' room. This is being an adult when parents visit
I just had a visual of u banging and screaming at him at the same time.
Just stay awake and booze cruise it to class. How are you a senior and have never went to class drunk? No excuses, I have a better gpa.
Randomize
