Manager just farted into the intercom. Whole place heard it. A number of people stopped everything and looked at him. Best. Night. Ever.
I wish I could have two rating systems on iTunes. "This one is a 5 star. This one is only a 5 star when I'm baked."
I'm about to cry with happyness at the beer that will be consumed
I am soup sandwich. I have been at dAnce party
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
When I told her that her boyfriend was making out with another chick, all she said was "which one"
She can drink whiskey without a chaser and has a fridge full of whipped cream. Girlfriend potential
I'm having flashbacks from last night. Did I admit to pausing Whitney's funeral because I was watching porn? I believe I did.
this lady just pulled corn on the cob out of her purse
People like that make this world a better place.
Next time you think about divorce, consider this: a hot guy just walked in and I tried to suck in my back fat.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just blew my weed a kiss
Eating a grilled cheese at a strip club... good idea??
I'm not dropping acid and watching game of thrones with you. That just sounds like a disaster waiting to happen.
I left the party 20 min ago..just thought i would tell you so you wouldnt think i fell in the lake again
Hammered...8am...why is there chickens in the living room?
IT'S MY BIRTHDAY. I SHOULDN'T HAVE TO DRIVE 3 HOURS FOR BIRTHDAY SEX.
Randomize