worms taste like bacon by the way.
I always wondered what they tasted like.
I just opened a bunch of old flavored condoms just to see what they tasted like.
that knocking you heard last night......that was her head slowly going through the wall
I had never watched a guy jack off to me before, but let me tell you, it was a very uncomfortable experience.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
it is 7:54 and i am surrounded by drunk old people. drunk enough that my grandmother and her friend just compared boobs. as in, shirts off, bras coming down. save me.
Stumbled into class and into a desk. When I fell my bottle broke in my backpack. I had to leave there was vodka everywhere.
That bitch ruined vodka saturday
we all took turns holding you up and pretending that you were simba and that we were presenting you to the jungle
I offered you a bag but you said "I gotta break in the new carpet" and you puked all over the floor
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I still can't believe he came down from his hiding place in the tree voluntarily because he didn't want us to have to talk to the cops alone...
Dad and I are shitfaced screaming at Canadians in Walmart. Life is good.
I'm shoveling snow with a camel-pack full of beer in a blizzard. I love snow days as an adult!!!
We have your weave and dirt in our room.
I can't hang out with this penis. I'll start thinking I like the person it belongs to.
PSA Do not blow dry your junk.
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