Mario Lopez is the poor mans Ryan Seacrest
i googled "the goonies drinking game." i may be alone, but i'm living the college dream.
I found those 18 whoppers we bought.
I've never seen so many strippers at a funeral...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
well my dad not being home definitely made it less awkward to walk in carrying the bra I left wearing.
Uhh, there's a legit bruise on my boob.. Again how does he manage this
Oh god I may vomit into the teacup of debauchery.
I know. I know. The man who pulled me from my mother's womb was the same man who had his fingers in my vagina today. My life is a joke. I don't know how to feel about this.
I caved man... I fucked her so vigorously, desperately trying to correct her wonky eye. My determination was relentless.
You are a terrible person.
I just try to be optimistic...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I got so many dick pics last night. It was like a slideshow from heaven.
I'm going to reward myself for having sex with coffee and a breakfast burrito.
Homeboy just asked me to strip for him. He should not be this horny and allowed to be in Vegas with his kid.
I shouldn't have to tell you to stop throwing knives at me.
so apparantly i made out with 24 santas last night...and an elf...and a stoner
You know it's a good May 2-4 when it involves 14 straight hours of vodka slush and garlic bread
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