dear life, i get it, drinking is not a contest
mom took my condoms, found one in the trash the next day
I know she was great
told my boyfriend i was a virgin so he wouldnt feel bad since he is. now hes asking why his dick is so itchy. should i tell him why?
i don't see why you should, it's not like you told the other guys with the itchy dicks.
Me and my dog bond so much when im high.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
There's a Sam Adams brew house. How were we not supposed to go
hey quick question, what would you consider to be a "first date" porn?
Desperately trying not to throw up over the side of the ferry back to CT. Can't be the first one of the season.
Bro, the freshmen are smoking in the park again, do you need ammo for ur paintball gun?
It's either my own vomit or popcorn butter in my ear right now. Banking on the second one.
We made popcorn last night. So it's both
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You're lucky I'm tired or I'd take a pic of me mounting a reindeer yard decoration
she gave me her number and i just said "no. cant."
TOPLESS DRIVE THRU! I have no money and my dignity is at an all time low.
The exact people you expect to find at a bar at 2pm are here. Come visit. We'd really like the company.
I spilled wine on my pillowcase and I figure it's basically my lifeblood so I'm just leaving it
As in, legitimately worried. You just sent me a 6 message long text that did not contain any complete words.
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