I can officially say I had a blunt rolled on my ass
Guess who just got out of a ticket because the cop liked her costume? THIS GIRL.
Will you be my therapist? I don't want to tell me secrets to a strange person and be judged all over again when you have already taken the time to do it. Oh and I will pay you with alcohol
His arresting officer when they were busting up the squat party recognized him from the anti-drone protest. He was like Jesus kid, you were sober last time.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
mike is out of commission and cannot make breakfast. he's sitting with two frozen waffles on his face & smiling like an idiot.
If fixing it is ignoring it, and getting naked. Then yes we fixed it.
Yay! Also. When you're coming down eat waffles and touch yourself. You won't regret it.
I feel like my cat and I are playing mind games. I need more friends.
I know you're having some issues right now but can we focus on the gangbang?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My weirdest encounter with a stranger though was when for some reason they just gave me a box of unopened socks. Needless to say, I never used them.
On a scale from 1 to 10 how gross is it to get a chili dog from a vending machine?
Just got my LSAT score...if you need me I'll be drunk in a ditch somewhere.
that is very illegal...i love you.
I sure hope so...I wonder if he could tell in that email that I'm really good at blow jobs. Hopefully he heard that tone. Any means necessary.
A drunk frat boy just jumped on the hood of my car while I was driving down Bridge St. He yelled at me to keep going since he was playing frogger and needed another car to jump on... or a log. I hate this town.
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