Instead of asking if I had a condom she literally said " I'm not on the pill but I'm pro choice... your move"... I'm in love
jack dropped his pants and said "bet u've never seen a dick this big." which was really sad cuz i had never actually seen one that small...you have like pinch it between ur thumb and pointer finger to give a HJ
if my college career had corporate sponsors, they would be natty light and aim toothpaste.
I was drunk at peters. now im drunk at my apartment. and hungry. but mcdonalds is broken. wtf
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i chipped my tooth tryin to cut thru her pantyhose. that stuff is bulletproof.
I'm trying to spell out I love you with a series of photos of my penis, but I just realized I can't do the Y of you
You rode him down the last flight of stairs like a human sled.
On that note I give you a 10 for sticking the landing and staying on the whole ride.
Your whole purpose in life is to just float around and satisfy lonely women and also join lesbian couples in threesomes.
The best part of last night was the women's softball game on the TV at the strip club
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Wednesday is my day of reflection and making my dick and balls into shapes. So i'll be pretty busy.
I could just tape a camera with a live feed to my head & you could check in on me from time to time
my human sexuality class is the only class where the porn i watch the night before is relevant to the discussion the next day
I mean it's a good blow job, but it's not worth the four hour round trip.
Also, can next Friday be Long Underwear Friday instead of Jockstrap Friday? Because I'm about to cough up a testicle.
on the bright side i found your panties and the lid to the nutella
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