I was just making a list of the girls i have slept with and i can't remember your sisters name
she must wash her vagina with a dirtier vagina
not sure what i find more disconcerting, your text or the fact that i recognized that as a dane cook quote
im getting my college education on yahoo answers.
Just watched Hilary Duff have a three-some on Gossip Girl...all I could imagine was that LIzzie Maguire cartoon girl freaking out above their heads
dude, showing up drunk to physics was the best idea ever. I just tripled my participation for the semester. I love st pattys day
if that blanket by the dog bowl was your dog's "bed" then i apologize to bailey for having sex on it
They told me you were taking cheese cube shots and chasing them with barbecue sauce... Is this true?
me neither. i remember bell pepper tequila but not why or yelling
Hahaha, I forgot about doing shots out of the bell pepper
The Deck is crawling with Cougars. Sound the irresponsibility alarm and come drink with me on a Tuesday night.
Are you up yet? I really want to know if i tried sleeping in a field... i have the vaguest memory of trying to
i know i saw many looks of jealousy when i walked solo into subway carrying a cheesy gordida crunch after taco bell closing hours
I'm sure for most of the people, it was the one and only miracle they will see
The Australian strangers convinced me to leave him behind when they started chanting Aussie Aussie Aussie, Oy Oy Oy, and told me they had a bunch of beer at their place.
It's official cum is not a great leave in conditioner
I have 2 phone numbers written on my vagina. I told you I shouldnt be left to my own devices after tequila shots.
It doesn't matter how nice the shirt you wore to the bar was, you still shouldn't have worn it to a job interview
Randomize