This bar is like a mediocre whore house....but free
i am doomed to only fuck guys with curved cocks
It was like fucking a house. Down the chimney. That deep and empty.
I think I just found part of a tooth on my bed... What goes on in here?
25 Children of Helicopter Parents Admit The Most Horrible Thing They Were Put Through
I didn't scare your mother by showing up on the roof, did I?
She's laying here with her head in my lap stoned, eating Doritos, whining about her boyfriend, and listening to Cher. Fuck the friend zone.
I just sit in the cubicle for 8 hours and do keagles.
Do I need to take a photo of my sister's enlarged and disgustingly dark nipples to scare you into protection? DO I?
What do you need? A swimsuit and a liver of steel? What else?
Proof That Kendall Jenner Is The Queen of Cannes
Who shows up to work two weeks ago still drunk and freshly high on blow and gets a promotion and a raise? This girl. Good at business. Super good at being fucked up.
Just threw up in the MSO airport men's room. We're at that point this morning.
See! Theres potential!
Oh yeah. All good relationships start with a threesome.
I tried to order champagne at IHOP last night
are you putting in a lot of effort today like appearance wise
I am taking my rightful place as emperor of the undead appearance wise
i always handshake my one night stand, im classy like that.