i hope you realize when i said "grib" earlier i was referring to the gridded binary, a mathematically concise data format commonly used in meteorology to store historical weather forecast data. also meant in referential conjunction to my probability math class that i am failing at roughly 215pm tomorrow afternoon.
GO HOME AND LIKE EVERYTHING ON COLT'S FACEBOOK UNTIL 2007.
Wtf it's a Friday night?
PRIORITIZE.
He was like a Bill Nye the science guy of sex....he was telling me things about my clitoris that I didn't even know
the fact that my dorm room overlooks a children's daycare is enough initiative for me to have safe sex.
Just drove through Taco Johns wearing a drug rug and no pants. When I rolled down my window, the girl paused for a minute before saying "um... 4.07"
Can you fuck me on the kitchen counter at some point? I'll lysol it after
I kept trying to give you water and you kept spitting it back at me. You looked like a camel. People were staring
I have pictures of you taking tequila shots off the front of the police car when the cop wasn't looking.
you know you have a brother who cares when he hands you a piece of pizza before you pass out from too many bong hits
I just did the math. It is, in fact, cheaper to go out drinking every weekend than it would be for me to pay for a legitimate therapist. What are you doing next Friday night?
Nothing like a false "my-dad-found-my-weed" alarm on Christmas day.
Girl I love you like I've been drinking all day
I ended up in bed with a man from London in a sorority wing I am not apart of. Tequila fucks you up
I did way too many drugs this past week for having a broken nose #commitment
Don't trim your pubes if you've been drinking. I can't believe I have to tell you more than once.
Randomize
