Omg I def was not. I wasn't that drunk. I showed that I stuff my bra but I didn't whip my tit out.
what happens if a cat eats a birth control pill? i mean i don't care about the cat i really just don't want to get pregnant
I just spent an unhealthy amount of money overnighting a full adult sized Trix Rabbit Halloween costume
note to self... there IS such a thing as having too many birthday shots...
i think you know its gunna be a bad day when it starts with throwing up into a red plastic cup
Turns out shot glasses hold the perfect serving of sour patch kids....I still fail to see how not having any real glasses is an issue
Yeah, I wouldn't mind getting fingered in the corner of a dive bar again.
Literally I thought my ears were pouring out blood. That high.
I haven't found him passed out in the living room covered in noodles for a while now so I guess he's getting better with the drinking.
Katelyn drunkenly ripped the soap dispenser off the wall so we decided to call it quits
What happened to my knees?
You ate shit in front of the homeless people. They applauded.
The only people in the library at 5:00 on the friday after finals are homeless or pre-med.
At Walgreens. I'm getting condoms and a bottle of water so that I'm not "just getting condoms". I don't think I'm fooling anyone though.
And for today's main disappontment. I thought I saw a midget with fireworks get on the buss, alas it's a child with cleaning supplies
He said he loved me more than Kel loves orange soda
the result of growing up in the '90's
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