Who knew there were guys that wanted to only stalk you instead of date you? Count on me to find them!
I haven't had sex in so long I'll probably find some stranger, feel guilty, go w/o sex for several months and do it all over again...always something to look forward to
is it bad that i think of my life in terms of the sims? like when i'm hitting it off with someone, i really wish a plus sign would appear above my head. and when i throw up from drinking way too much, a minus sign.
A good Q tip ear swabbing is better than bad sex.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You sent me a text calling me "cunt" while i was in the middle of dumping my bf.
So we're fucking tonight?
i just keep taking vicodin and supergluing random shit
I'm doing shots of crown out of a baby bottle. My friends are sensational parents.
im laying here in the parking lot drinking a warm coke, prob still drunk, feeling like i need to apologize to everyone i know
I put bits of fruit cocktail in the jello shots i made because i knew that they were gonna be the only thing we ate all day
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Things I woke up with this morning: half a mcmuffin, orange hair, one shoe and a friendly german man. Tequila was a brilliant idea.
His wife made me pancakes and let me borrow a clean shirt. Should I drop his class or use this to my advantage
Wake up we need to beat the walk of shame rush hour
wtf why is there glitter all over my dog
Buying a new pipe this morning, and setting up career plans this afternoon. It's called balance
My co-worker accidentally texted me regarding the threesome him and other one are planning.
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