i had 75 notifications coming from ur status. here i was thinking i had friends.
It's called penis withdraw. Or alcoholism. I get them confused these days.
A hangover is a type of food poisoning. Makes me feel better about calling out of work.
its like accelerated beer pong for children.....we train champions young
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We need to get sombreros so I can give them to strippers.
So to distract myself from jackies vomiting, im making up a story in my head. It's called the little penis that could
Winner winner, chicken dinner. I am the sole survivor of the orgy without strep. Or maybe I was the carrier?
after the fucking you spent twenty minutes vomiting naked and shaking your dick at my roommates. luckily, i don't remember that, or i'd have to be really insulted.
Did I run into a tree or get punched in the face?
Both.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Hey nothing wrong with those! I can't believe the guys who let me see where they live on first dates. Even more surprising, I don't stalk them after they've done me wrong.
You're the only person I know who can be puking into a trash can at 8 in the morning in Manhattan and get a date out of it....
And on the first day of my adult job, I matched with one of my co workers on tinder...
I don't think you understand...I'm really good at getting drunk
WHY DID YOU NOT OFFER TO LET HIM STAY
Dude, it's like you want him inside me more than i do
Too much dab too little lung dying 😵😵😵
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