Every time we have sex I can't stop thinking about Jesus
I'm at a bar that has girls so awful looking even you would not have sex with them.
Well... I doubt that.
I just got off a plane from Mexico. At least 15 passengers dashed to the bathroom throughout the flight. Can you tell its spring break?
both the worst and best vomit ever... it was extra chunky and thick cause of the sausage... but it also tasted like delicious sausage... also cause of the sausage
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
When the cops knocked on the door, he just knocked back and announced "house keeping"
You know when you blow me it's the softest, most amazing feeling ever. Like putting my dick in a silk bag filled with puppy ears.
When you wake up so hungover that you don't even wanna cough for fear of vomiting... It's not gunna be a good day.
So Doritos and vodka was obviously not as good an idea as I thought at the time.
Of course I have a pirate flag
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I know I don't have feelings for him because I feel completely ashamed every time after we have sex
There's a guy running dressed as a bunny toward your house.
Pretty sure we ruined a bachelorettes life last night
Its not that hard to understand he's my holiday boyfriend, we ignore each other most of the year except on holidays when I give him head
Text me some of your sweat
Lunch date was a success. And you'll be proud- my legs stayed closed.
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