its good for cellulite if you don't wear underwear. its true
508, what difference does it make? You were alone, anyway.
im at a bar with my dad last night and he got hit on more that I did
you never know, standards drop, they turn gay, shit happens.
May or may not have found my way onto a stripper bus. To Chicago.
The window painters skipped us. They didn't know what to do with the giant SMOKE WEED in the window. So they just skipped it.
I had to rip your toilet paper for you...
Two women at the Safeway just got out of their separate cars and kissed. One was driving an outback, the other a CRV. It was like a Honda and Subaru had a lesbian joint venture and filmed the commercial in front of me.
Dude! I just figured out I can successfully hide a 4oz flask between my boobs without endangering my cleavage! College: conquered!
Though the booty shorts might give me an extra discount. Or arrested. We'll see.
You attract beautiful men with jobs. I attract ONE WITH A SOUL PATCH.
it was a sexy soul patch.
Other than unclothed paranormal encounters, how has your day been
He played me Kanye.. Speaking my love language.. He got a well deserved BJ
My mom is dancing slutty on the bar I need more drinks to be ok with this
Idk but when you think about it the last time I did bottomless mimosas I ended up getting my nipples pierced so it might be fair
Randomize
