i'm pretty confident that i watched a woman making love to a german shepherd.
I'm at a work party and I don't know how to drink socially. You know, like slow?
Um....I woke up to a lipgloss covered bottle of Jack daniels in my arms..
You've kissed worse.
Thong +tight pants =hungry butt. Not a good look on big women! Walmart sucks.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Not only did I hold your hair back as you puked, i french braided it. I am such a great friend.
Still waiting. He said he'd call between 2 and 10... apparently he's like the Comcast of drug dealers.
Also, I found out tonight a major plus for being female is you can accidentally call the hot bartender sweet tits and she won't get mad.
You would think the bank would reward me for getting my account down to 3 cents without overdrafting it.
Idk but she keeps giving me s'mores and I'm having a hard time caring about her alcoholism because of it
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Should I be concerned you put your last name in my phone as "danger"?
i made the walk of shame wearing her booty shorts that said juicy on the back. i'm still counting it as a good night
I'm too drunk to explain this to you. It's too hard.
Concept: I never actually flirt with anyone, I'm just a bitch and some people find it endearing
tonight's safe word is brought to you by the phrase "Ahhhhhh"
And he put his penis in my face and I back handed it away.
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