32 messages asking me to suck his dick. And there for a minute i thought i was desperate. ha!
Hahahaha
make that 40.
This guy told us that for a dollar and two cigarettes he'd let Megan stomp on his crotch. We were gonna refuse, but we figured someone had to keep him from passing his stupid genes along.
oddly enough my penis is pretty tan. the part of my body that gets the least amount of sunlight is tanner than most of the rest of my body.
I think its part of male evolution. Pretty soon they'll have diamonds on them and taste like chocolate.
New. Vanessa hudgens nude pics
That text made me feel like i signed up for some awesome celeb nude pic reminder
Also, on a completely related note, just came up with an awesome business plan. You in?
Sam Adams makes it so easy to keep track of the seasons.
Is King's over? Or do I still have to say 'On Matt's cock' at the end of every sentence on matt's cock?
All I remember is passing out with an umbrella over my head and waking up screaming bad luck for seven years
It was almost as bad as the time I peed on the floor of the Pentagon's subway station.
I totally OverDed on K2 last night. I felt like I was made of lead and then I had a panic attack.
yeah, never be friends with someone with shitty eyebrows.. they obviously already make poor life choices
Oh like it's the first time I've had a bowl of wine
It might look like I curled my hair last night but it's just the jiz.
She was here for a threesome... She doesn't have to put the new roll of toilet paper on the dispenser. She can leave the new roll wherever she wants!
Remind me to tell you about this weekend with them. It was the least fun I have ever had drinking. And I have thrown up pork and beer through my nose on the side of the freeway.
Not sure she's stomping around my apartment muttering incoherently about wanting to speak to the colonel
Randomize
