Just met a synchronized swimmer, can you imagine the things she could do in the water
Legs for days
Harpoon that
We basically counted to 3 and then dumped each other.
I really wish I didn't have to wear pants this is ridiculous
my advisor is telling us the best way to sneak in alcohol on move in day. I definately picked the right college
Someone changed my text signature to "Also, I think I might be gay" last night. Also, I think I might be gay
You're making her cookies in enchange for knitting lessons. You will die a virgin.
Its... i dont even know. theres lots of rap music and i cant find my shoes
I may not have eyeballs after all the drunk naked people having sex outside.
do you ever feel so high you're swimming backstroke and then you realize you're still laying in bed on tumblr
i was on the fire escape while he ate me out for a while before i realized he had shut the door behind us and locked us out and i proceeded to climb down the stairs and climb back into the party through the window.
i can only hope to be on your level one day.
My Sundays are fucking awful. Can't get a blow job.....can't get a win.
The only joy I have here is being able to shit with the door open.
She told me having sex was our civic duty. How can I not love her?
My ex husband is now my side piece. #thisis30
I managed to convince her that the egg yolks were actually orange juice and she fell for it
Randomize