we didnt fuck last night. again. seriously, his place is like where dreams go to die.
woke up to find a pram in the balcony. first thing we did was look over the edge!
So I feel really bad about last night...can i give you a blow job and we call it even?
His facebook says he is a fan of "underwater handjobs"
Christmas on farmville was waaaaay better than my actual Christmas.
I ran a string through all of my old vicodin bottles and strung them on the tree. Tis the season.
just let her blow you already, it's practically animal cruelty at this point.
I'm not as easy in Europe as I am in the US
Only because you can wipe your slut slate clean & start anew. It's a little known benefit of our currency exchange.
i think she just faxed a picture of her vag from the office copy machine... i mean what kind of sexting is that... wait is that even legal???
Felt so good this afternoon, figured I wouldn't have a comedown. Wrong. Just realized I've been staring at a wall for 40 minutes contemplating the color yellow.
I wouldn't call us friends exactly. Honestly I just hang out with him so I can hit on his girlfriend. They won't last long, and I'll be there to pick up the scraps
i just need to find someone who enjoys eating frozen waffles as much as I do. It will be perfect.
DICK-CITY HERE WE COME
She said my penis was powerful and magnificent
What you have to understand is that our lives aren't a disappointment so much as they crashed and burned with lethal doses of radiation and dog shit.
Randomize
