She was not exactly lady-like. Down there.
My dad just sent me a text telling me to "say hi to all the luscious bitches" at the gay bar. Guess this explains my childhood
If a girl is wearing Ed Hardy from head to toe, does that make her a douchebagette?
Im going to buy a thermometer. If its above 104 im going to the hospital if its under 104 im going to the bar
whiskey dick. though we did manage to break my closet door and flood the bathroom.
Yes, that was ME getting carried out of the club singing 'i believe i can fly'
Weer fine. went to buiy cigxs, but hes theonly one waering shoes. He caem out wti chicke fingers instead. whatecer, there th 8 dollar kind.
Dude she's famous. She's on an episode of campus pd. Can't not fuck her
Change of plans I'm coming home and shotgunning all the beer we have.
Maybe you shouldn't go to cosmic bowling, i don't know if cum glows and I don't wanna find out i'm sure his parents don't either.
Can I just skip the lesson I have planned for tomorrow and just teach my students about Prohibition using my impending hangover?
This is why american education is failing
Probably gonna run and pray I throw up. Then go get a coffee/bagel & continue to rally
I am going to paint butt plugs like little Christmas trees and give them as gifts.
You could paint cock rings as wreaths.
Sometimes a man just deserves to get woken up with a blowjob.
Next time I think it’s a good idea to hook up with any of your wife’s family members or friends just kick me in my dick
Randomize
