he kept bringing up different times we had sex and i wouldnt say anything back. i would never confirm nor deny the situation...like a politician ya kno
Yeah i'm definitely friends with drunk kyle, not sober kyle.
you know it's bad when you need sunglasses to open the refrigerator
Having drunken flash backs of me giving you a piggy back ride. I was like Jesus, and you were my cross. I fell so many times for you. This is true friendship.
I don't know but the stairs are covered in apples
She just threw the soap bottle at me from the ladie's room and keeps asking me when we left the bar and got on the boat.
I left the guinea pigs on the dryer. Make sure to take care of them.
Everyone was passed out so I turned off the lights and locked all the doors. I also took the chicken sandwich in the microwave as payment.
Invited the whole bar back to my place for an after party.....shit got real with everyone seeing dad drink moonshine like a champ.
Was so drunk I had to masturbate face up cuz I thought I was gonna be suffocated by the pillows.
She doesn't even know his real name...he just keeps calling himself Hans the Third
He started tongueing his parfait and told "thats what I'd to your ass" in the middle of Starbucks. Of course i brought him home
His pick-up lines are quotes from Doctor Who. Of course I fucked him.
If I win the lottery I'm going to hire someone to skywrite "FUCKTARD" over his house. That much anger.
I always feel bad for the sober driver... Never been me but I feel bad... empathetic AF
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