that's an acceptable place to lick
I think I found my soulmate. This guy in front of me is yelling about getting laid while holding two beers and texting. I think this is love.
twelve hours since my last beer and i just blew a .08, time to go to the library
well judging by the amount of dired blood around my nipple rings i'm gonna assume it was a good night
If she wants to think that freshman 15 means sleeping with 15 guys than so be it I just gotta make sure I'm one of them.
Of all the things I am low enough to do, how could you even doubt if that was one of them?
Well, as a member of the greater american southwest gay community I just have to mark this as a total loss and you will be missed.
I just fucked my ex's ex's ex. Love quadrilateral complete
I swear the pregnant cashier was jealous when I bought my plan B
This is the 4th time we've hooked up, and this morning we woke up, he got out of bed and left. Left me alone in his apartment with 3 of his friends. Without even a word. Why do i like this guy?
I believe you called it tequila and nipples. The proceeded to strike a pose.
i definitely signed you up to receive text message notifications from a jukebox last night. Not even sorry.
I can't wait to shower all this regret off of me
Yes we can sext. I'm taking my socks off.
there is another microwave in the elevator.
Randomize
