can you wear a superman outfit if we ever have sex?
Took his v-card last night. Yet another experience I didn't expect to have in my thirties.
i just went to use the bathroom this morning and I couldn't because there was someone puking in every stall. i'm going to miss the dorms this summer
Pretty sure that drunken football on the back porch with 6 guys with a champagne bottle was a bad idea....
He did the "not my house dance." Apparently it involves spreading cereal on the floor and then grinding into the carpet in bare feet while singing "not my house" over and over and dancing.
And if it was a miscarriage you should figure out whose it was. He must be an alphamale for his offspring to sustain life this long in the amusement park that is your body
have to get expensive furniture. after that study abroad now at least six things at ikea are named after guys i slept with
it was good sex until i became a rubber doll and he became a jack hammer, so i guess overall it was good
She is the absolute last thing I would want to screw. Honestly. Fellating a porcupine. Higher on the list.
I think it says something about my sobriety when I don't notice a Taco Bell wrapper stuck to my ass until I'm in the shower...
I want to preface this by saying nothing happened, nothing is on fire. It is mere speculation. Do we have a fire extinguisher?
He left for work so I drank pickle juice from his fridge
Girl you know I'm an advocate of debauchery but you might wanna check yoself.
But truly, sorry about your empty vagina
Glitter fights sound a lot funner in theory.