Saw a Delta Zeta recruitment poster today. On it, somebody added, "All you need is your daddy's credit card and a lack of self-respect."
I make my boyfriend pay for half of my birth control. We call it his monthly rent.
I just had a flashback to last nights party, I'm pretty sure I told most of the people there that I post a masturbation schedule for an iCal download.
I should take him calling me "a freak of nature" after sex as a compliment, right??
19 People Who Had An Inappropriate Celebrity Encounter
Ohhhh sweet! I may be down for that. I'll be a german beer girl probably passed out on a park bench somewhere.
I think mom knows I'm drunk I put a full blown balloon in the fridge.
Someday, but I will be heavily drugged and there will be no dolphins.
So stoned i forgot i was in bed
You're tall, so I have high hopes for your dick.
21 Awkward Ways People Found Out Their Partner Was Into Outrageous Sex Acts
Just gave my pregnant cat a safe sex talk. That high.
Does it qualify as sexting if you're both pretending to be fictional characters?
I'm not sure whether to be proud of you or weirded out.
She just walked up to him and was like "you should fuck Angela" and it worked! She is the ultimate wingman
No it'll be my boobs and the luge part will be from my nipples. Everyone will be sucking beer from my perfectly sculpted and partially melted tits.
I would have publicly shamed him but I'm pretty sure his tramp stamp did that on its own...
I just haymakered a dude with my face, can we talk about ME for a second and not the guy I fought?