is that paris hilton dressed up as the guy from star trek who hosts reading rainbow
oh, also, we're locked out of the house and we're going to have to take shelter with the hot, poss single, dad next door. i hope this turns into a porno
I'm playing the Jersey Shore drinking game by myself at my mom's house. Things like this are not okay after college.
She bought a fucking hedgehog. And that's just the tip of the crazy iceberg.
Sorry for walking in on you guys last night. FYI I have a bruise on my forehead from having the door slammed in my face. I deserved it.
I FUCKING SERVED PEOPLE AND POURDED JUGS AND GOT FREE BEEEEEEEERERTERRY
I tried to pay my tab and go home but she wrote me a "list of things I'm good at" with fellatio as no 1...
I hope you get some kind or rare disease that makes your dick ties itself in a knot for fucking her you lucky bastard.
I could definitely fill a shot glass w my cum
please don't
I just pulled a seven inch black hair out of my ass. Pretty sure that means we're dating now
I hate her so much I want to fuck her boyfriend.
Alone, in the dark, eating tacos and drinking vodka. Who's apartment is this?
It really hurts to walk. Any idea what happened to my hip?
Did you at least know who's jizz it was?
That is questionable.
Want to go to Victoria’s Secret? His fiancée is out of town and I’m going to try and stop the wedding with lingerie and lots adventurous sex
Absolutely! I love a good sexual filibuster!
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