ive decided theres a fine line between accepting money for sex and letting someone buy you late night taco bell and knowing that if he hadnt you wouldnt be in his bed right now
You stuck the head of a rubber chicken you found in her house up your ass and then started running around her living room. Naked.
The glockenspiel player has some booze though so hopefully the ride won't be that bad
How long is it safe to eat only Hot Pockets and Popsicles?
Its that time of year where we just drink more instead of dressing warmer
and she just brought her bike into the shower with her
you left me with this keg alone. this is on your hands
It was a taxi full of fist pumps and chanting to "face down, ass up". It was that 1% that makes my job worth it.
It's like when your main girl and your side girl start having their period in the same week
You are the most depressed sports fan I know
Will you trust fall hold me, so I can pee of this building.
he fucked me wearing a cowboy hat and made grits after
We call him Texas for a reason.
If only he'd realize the fondness I have for his genitals.
dude the water is back on, you can stop shitting under the tree . . .
Saw a sign that said the chorus of never gonna give you up was enough time to wash your hands. Coronavirus has Rick rolled me.
I'm not saying it wasn't great. I'm just saying sleeping with a gassy, depressed,45 year old mother was a different experience. Would do it again though.
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