I just crawled out of a second story window using a sheet and his clothes for a rope so he wouldn't wake up.
I am so glad I watched Macgyver as a kid.
Mental picture: Us at a bar keeping it classy shot gunning PBR's in the corner.
That was a good example of when keeping it real goes right
On a scale of "impaired judgement" to "Mel Gibson," how drunk are you?
Toaster
dudes here are drinking wine, and not in the forgivable 'just doing this to get laid' way
Help. All alone. Room is. Changing colors. Dance party 2010, but without dancing.
Did you sleep with Connor? And who undressed me? There's a picture of two guys peeing out my bedroom window. What happened?
Just so you know, this text is a buffer between the two guys I'm sexting. Can't get that shit messed up.
It was like being fucked by the god of thunder, he gained power from the storm. I took a Plan B because I don't think regular birth control will stop Thor's sperm.
So neither of us had a dollar bill and we couldnt find a straw so we spent all nite doing coke through penne pasta
i was completely deserted.. so i stood outside starbucks for 20 minutes trying to convince the employees to open early and take care of me.. fuck you guys
So heartbroken my rebound has a rebound
And as the acid sets in, he looks back at the shallow form he used to call his and whispers "3 pee pees strong"
One public bathroom does not equal a wedding vow
I encourage you to ignore feeling. Drinking more helps
Your the only person I know that needed stiches after a Monday morning conference call. How are you in your 20s? How
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