This bar is like a mediocre whore house....but free
Don't threaten to terrorize my ass hole unless you have to wherewithal to back it up
He just kept muttering to himself "stabby stabby stabby stabby" while we were boning. I will never be boning him again.
I dislocated my rib eating pizza. I think I am broken.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Well anything after a French guy would have been a disappointment. But I'm fairly certain he was just trying to masturbate into me.
I faked an orgasm during phone sex last night. This relationship is starting to become real.
HOW DO I ALWAS FIND THEM?! THERE WAS BE A SOCIETY OF SMALL PENISED MEN AND I MUST BELONG TO IT!
What I do when I'm blackout drunk is none of my business.
His ex-girlfriend just gave his current girlfriend the heimlach omg omg omg help this is so awkward
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
you know that moment when all the alcohol kicks in and suddenly you realize the bar is very loud and you just want to bite someone sexy and ride their face i am kinda at that moment
We are such grown women, dealing with life's problems one shower beer and reckless makeout session at a time.
I tried to bring you in when you passed out on the porch but all you said was that I "ruined your hope ands dreams of becoming an astronaut"
would it be okay if I showed up at your house naked? and is your door unlocked?
Well I told him I’ve got the flu....he said he’d wear a condom
Really should've known 2020 was gonna suck when the guy dressed as baby new year got arrested at our party 5 past midnight...
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