school has made you so classy.
that's mcgill. producing sluts since 1884.
He spent the whole night convincing me I wasn't fat, but after we had sex he said "Oh, I see what you mean"
Well hey if hot cowboys are involved then all bets are off.
This is no lauging matter. Huge cock equals great sex. Marriage to huge cock equals great life.
He is eating chips off the floor in the emergency room..
I'm not trying to alarm you guys, but I think I just swallowed a ketchup packet.
It could be worse. I was dumped by a guy in a kilt after he gave my shoes away on St. Patrick's Day.
we fucked in the backseat of my car at the observatory, right under the stars. it was a starry, orgasmic filled night
YOU CAN'T JUST ADD EVERYONE WHO ENTERS MY VAGINA ON FACEBOOK WTF
On today's episode of "What the Shit Did I Do Last Night," drunk me deleted ALL of the text messages I've ever had. Awesome.
I can't remember what I did last night, but judging from the state of my hair I had a pretty good time.
Lets get drunk. But not too drunk that I can't work in the morning. But maybe drunk enough so we'll make out
Yea...Let's just say I gave her the best 3 and half minutes of her life then she took a 40 minute cab ride home that she paid for...
I think I left my thong in your bed. Careful. It has the power to destroy the agitator on a washing machine
I just gave my boss a blowjob. underneath his desk at work. that promotion is mine!
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