She is totes cute on her twitter. Which totally sounds like a euphemism for coot.
I want to touch your soul through your body...with my penis...
Mike i'm at church right now...
we can't become the bulimic house in the complex dude. Besides, you need teeth for your career.
I'm terrified to sleep next to her. Of course the sex will be fuckng awesome.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Fuck men. I'm going to go eat a package of cookie dough and get fat. I hope I die of salmonella.
we found her in my closet eating a clove of garlic.
I think that the winner of this years fantasy football league should get naming rights to you child
I am now best friends with a lesbian named Zulu. I am pretty hammered already and made a game time decision to stay here another night,for partying purposes
He insists on falling asleep with his penis between my buttcheeks. He says its his "home".
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My Midnight Kiss was a Big Mac.. Happy New Year
I accidentally sent a snap of my puss with the Republican filter... Totally killed his boner
His dick isn't even good enough to be this much of an asshole
I haven't answered because I haven't figured out a polite way of saying fuck no
Do not confuse my plans for being an adult though. I will ABSOLUTELY be practicing suturing, on my porch, while getting stoned.
Something is wrong here. The birds are chirping and I'm not fucking you, I'm not getting head and I don't smell bacon. Why am I up this early then?
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