so he must've not known that your lastname is Came because everytime someone would say your name he would scream "NO SHE DIDNT" to the whole party. He must've not been too good then either.
it feels like theres a golf ball between my legs. the sex was totally worth it tho.
he was humming party in the usa while we were having sex.
I didnt believe in cockblocking untill my roomate brought home that.
look for us when you get to the club. we're the guys wearing snorkels.
Did you ever stop and think that god invented whiskey dick specifically for me
I woke up on the toilet with my feet gorilla glued to the floor, cake and makeup on my face and my hand glued to my head.
Welcome to the world of vodka. Rule #1: NEVER PASS OUT. Happy 21st
Well I went on a freakin rampage and destroyed a fan and claimed that it wasn't doing its fan duties... Then I knocked on everybody's doors in the hall and asked if they were content with their fan's performance and if not I would take care of it...
And then we made magical love in his room under a blacklight as his roommate and girlfriend argued violently in the living room
I will not get drunk on our first date. I will not get drunk on our first date. I will not get drunk on our first date.
You are the funniest drunk Jew I know. Never in my life have I witnessed someone respond, "Is your dick kosher?" while being picked-up on.
I can't tell if you're talking about my pussy or Cape Cod.
He says it takes a lot to subdue the urge to just bury his face in my vagina. Of course, I have absolutely no problem with this.
Thus began an intricate shell game of nude cardigan photos
On a scale of 1 to 10, with 1 being “good” and 10 being “banging a student’s father”, how bad is it that I’m banging a student’s father?
Randomize
