go do what you do best...puke behind churches
This is your Morning Wood Report: I have it.
Can we have fireworks this year or will the ocean explode?
I'm guessing "whatever I can get" wasn't the reply the nurse wanted when asking what med I need. Oh, and asked for a cartoon band-aid.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
His hands were made for my vagina.
I am kinda proud of you, its like seeing my slutty baby take its first step
Even my Russian and Serbian roommates think I drink to much.
He's a waiter, looks 15, and told me he loved me after only talking to me for 30 minutes. I told him I wanted a margarita. We got 3 free pitchers. I may have to make this our regular Wednesday night hangout.
Did u see the proverb she left as a comment on my picture?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
New York City is dangerous when the only bars you go to are the ones that have 'open' in front
So you're on like a list there now..."Do not under any circumstances give this person a knife. Serve them in plastic cups ONLY"
Not exactly hook line and sinker right away, but I'll give him a second chance. I should sext him me in my blue shark onesie.
got a free grilled cheese. Didn't even have to talk about Jesus
Do the security cameras outside your house capture sound? If so your whole family is going to hear me describe my threesome
well that was a fail
maybe for you, but i got a free ice cube in my bra
Randomize