I have no idea what her name is. I only remember putting my dick between her ass cheeks.
I'm watching tv and he's trying to stick a vibrator in my ass
I get so lonely sometimes I set my phone's alarm to go off every 5 minutes or so and imagine people are texting me.
I know this is weird, but can you ask your girlfriend if she has my mailbox?
Seriously?
100%
I have blocked the memory from my mind. He is just a fuzzy cloud floating with my other bad decisions..
Hey. Be honored that I consider you the genital expert. I know alot of candidates for the position.
I'm bringing vagina and cookies. You'll be fine.
I couldn't think of the word "bath" so instead I told him I was marinating in soapy water
What alcohol should i drink Saturday to completely hate life?
I'm the only person who goes to break up a friends with benefits and comes out with a boyfriend
You answered, dry heaved into the phone twice, & then hung up on me.
I saw your dick pic and thought there goes the last thread of my heterosexuality.
he sent a dick pic to my best friends phone for me cause mine died lol pretty sure he was regretting that night outta town.
I swear he is my soulmate. He kept feeding me goldfish while we were fucking. Who wouldn't enjoy that while having sex.
My vagina knows your penis is sad about Andrew Luck. You should come over and let her comfort him in his time of need
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