i can't wait to go to hell
yeah...all of my friends will be there for sure
there were no ball for pong so he bought cat toys..... they had bells in them
Just got to school and somone already mentioned the amount of cereal im carrying.
Do you remember puking up your retainer into the toilet and putting it right back in your mouth?
Friends help friends remove their foot from the sunroof after an epic smoke sesh.
You beat him at the shot competition, and proceeded to rub it in while telling everyone to "ASK ME A MATH QUESTION!!!"
You can jump from the roof to the pool. Trust me. I have done this before.
I had a 10 minute conversation with the refrigerator, it was telling me how it likes to be opened and closed. Ecstasy, I love you.
Never go with a hippy to a second location. I fucking hate Xanax.
Yeah that's a good idea.. I like to be responsible when I trip my nuts off
i just thought a plastic bag was my cat. i just pet a plastic bag. that high.
I'm way too hungover for life right now
He told me I was a good dog mom. I've never been so turned on in my life
He got up after sex and said "is it wrong if I say happy Mother's Day?"
I am so so sorry I bit your butt last night. Twice.
Randomize
