im a genious. moved my bed and mirror so i can watch the game while Fucking
he was fingering the outside of my pants..i knew that was my cue to leave
Aj and I already plan to tape our thumbs to our palms so we know how it feels to be a t-rex.
And by defning the relationship I mean telling him I'm gonna fuck other people but its cool If he does the same.
Yes he was puking but in the only light of the whole parking lot and he was resting in the patch of clovers and he just was a garden fairy
My phone broke again .... im not really sure how im going 2 explain the teeth marks to the ppl at the Verizon store
He's German, so by default he gets to fuck me.
Just found weed in my belly button. Happy Saturday!
You know you're baked when you feel your throat closing up from an allergic reaction to the pecans in the cookie you're eating but you keep eating the damn cookie.
To give you an idea, there's a group upstairs trying to break down a door with their fists and heads.
Better safe and shitfaced than hungover and in need of another surgery.
strip teases shouldnt end with an expensive car covered in salsa and mayonnaise yet here we are
HE BEAT A GUY WITH NOTHING BUT RAZZLE DAZZLE AND HIS FABULOUSNESS
Enough talk of my burning loins. How is your day?
Dear god my vagina.
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