the entire time we were hooking up i couldn't stop thinking about the bengals. thoughts?
Does the whole "it was New Years" excuse apply this year?
Do Not. I repeat. DO NOT DRINK WHISKEY TO COPE. You will end up in jail. LEARN FROM THE PRO
i left because you were standing at the top of the stairs throwing shot glasses and bottles full of alcohol at me and yelling JAGERBOMBS
When I take mushrooms I can feel your presence down there. I can feel where Africa is too.
Want to come over and play therapist and then fuck all the emotion away?
I have a 16 minute video of you talking about your life. We are calling it your Anthology sponsored by Steel Reserve
You seriously knocked all the beer off the table, broke the beer pong table, broke the bar and kept yelling "you have to warn me first!" all because I wouldn't let you have another four loco
I'd just like to formally thank you for the size of your dick. The gods must really love you.
Also this just in, I think you could see my sequins underwear that say unwrap me through my leggings all day while I hung out with his family
He caught a Pokemon on my head while I sucked him off. I think I need to marry him.
Did you really have to freak out and get up half way through to put the cat in the closet?
...
he tried to have the "are we in a relationship" chat last night. I stuck my fingers in my ears, yelled lalalalalala very loudly at him and told him I would stop having sex with him if he ever tried that conversation again. bad person, or just being a realist?
These guys are just fucking with my heart instead of fucking me. They're fucking up.
There’s so much sex at the hospital I’m beginning to think scrubs were invented to make duty booty easier
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