Note to self: When getting ready to leave with a kid in a wheelchair don't say Let's roll
I just saw a homeless man dressed as a pirate. I love san francisco.
she's basically destroyed all of the faith i had that skinny blond girls could be a functioning part of society.
Apparently when he woke up I was tripping my face off. Everytime the cat meowed I would meow back. This went on for several hours.
Anyways, i'm off to play with a rubber dick and a ouija board with two other girls...
After Sake bombs he tried to puke into an alluminum beer bottle and shot vomit streaks in a perfect V out the sides of his mouth and hit BOTH girls he had bought drinks for that night. He was like an Icon of Cock-blocking yourself.
He suggested abortion before I finished the sentence. That was my plan too, but now I feel like should keep it just to prove how big of a dick he is.
Just rolled over and found your boyfriend in bed with me. Is mine at your house?
You left a trail of sequins from your dress incase we got lost
Ive waited a long time for a girl with prescriptions like yours.
You would be too ashamed to ever love me again if you saw the filth I just created. It brings unspeakable dishonor to the nacho dynasty. Like I raped the king's daughter, cut off her hands and made him eat them that's how hard I fucked up nachos.
How external is "for external use only"?
Great, now even dream!me is a drunken borderline mess.
But unlike the human Walter the plant Walter will someday grow to satisfy my needs
I promised to leave my panties on but I didn't promise to not have sex
Randomize
