I'm trying to bond with my sister... Its like getting to know a person I never met that I don't like
I hate when my naked walk-arounds are interrupted by someone knocking on the door
OMFG, I'm seriously about to get fairly unpolite with this guy.
Wow. I bet he's shakin' in his boots.
i've been called drunk 4 times today and it's only 3pm
Guess who is high enough to buy Jingle All The Way?
Let's create a 16 and pregnant drinking game
It's safe to say that our attempt at trying to fuck in the grand Sierra elevator was a bad idea.
We had to take the hinges off the bathroom door. Needless to say, you are no longer welcome at that bar
Of the 4 nights I've gone downtown this week, I've been "piss in the parking lot" drunk 5 times
Summary of my night: made out with a complete stranger at a club dressed in the Geico gecko costume...
how do you always get into these "we banged the same dude now lets be friends" situations???
It's gotten to the point where waking up in my own apartment is a surprise
Just got done being naked and Mooning the cops. I'm still alive. Let's drink.
I swear I have some evil slut demon in me when I'm blacked out
Don't we all.
They picked up the lamp, held it aloft, and proclaimed apropos of nothing “this is going right up my ass”. LOUDLY
Randomize
