I just saw a girl make a shank with the underwire in her bra...
i dont understand blimps. what would happen if they collided would they just bounce off or fall to the ground.
dude how high are you right now?
do you think jeeves would know? you do it. ask jeeves.
Jason and steven are boiling shrimp in the microwave again
All i remember is people cheering me on to drink faster than the dog, out of the dog's bowl. I just couldn't stop.
All is not lost. The bondage chair came with repair seals and glue. It's like the knewwwwwww this would happen.
Our cab driver looks like Kim Jong il, and you're missing a fascinating conversation about Katie wanting to be carbon dated.
I am the worst sexter. i actually told him .. if i had a penis, it would be hard right now. BTW thats a turn off.
She asked the woman in the drive through to cover everything she ordered in mayonnaise, including here chilli cheese fries. Didn't happen. Then she started swerving at the car next to us screaming, asking if they had mayonnaise.
Can we skip lunch and do power hour sex time from now on? I'll let you eat nachos off my body if you really need the food.
Whenever you're sad about your life, just remember that I'm on a first name basis with the late night taco bell drive-thru workers.
Back. Waiting on Thong the shuttle bus driver. THONG
She asked for references to decide whether she wanted to have sex with me. And she was serious.
I'm like going proud parent over you doing drugs, this is so wrong.
It's very rude to dive mouth-first into someone's crotch without knowing if their wife is cool with it.
its hard to say precisely how it happened, but the next thing i knew i was on top of a mountain
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