wrigley field is MILF paradise
you know how you have to have just the right ratio of chips to sandwich? same goes for pubes.
ha so i just found a picture of you eating paper towels and many of Laura freaking out from it.
we turned studying into a drinking game, she drinks when she gets it right, i drink when she gets it wrong. so we'll be out soon
just taught 3 girls from korea how to fist pump on chat roulette.
I've been very busy/drunk lately... Sorry.
I walked home with an awkward asain couple. There was a language barrier but I think we're friends now.
im tired of her bring homeless men home when shes drunk. THEY ARE NOT FUCKING PETS!!!!
How early is too early to study with margaritas?
My new roommate is awesome. His father owns a bar and his sister has an E cup. I'm going to be with him forever
Stealing, and booze. If only you added meaningless sex with random people you would have wrapped all your life passions together
I know it's anime porn but I promise you the guy looks like Fred Durst
THAT'S NOT NICE
NEITHER WAS PROMISING NOT TO TAKE MY SISTER'S VIRGINITY, THEN PROMPTLY DOING SO
He fed me Girl Scout cookies while I was still tied up...what did I do right?
You rolled over grabbed my crotch and said "that's my waffle." I'm sleeping on the couch next time.
Randomize
