Thats about the time I should have known you would run around naked and try to make out with my sleeping mother
Still workable. Pretty sure i told her i'd eat her out in the woods.
I wish i could sleep and get drunk at the same time...those are my 2 biggest needs right now
It's like the Sean Connery of vaginas. You don't mess with it.
It's an acquired taste. Like keystone. Or caviar.
Its a three day weekend with Valentines day thrown in... Im obligated to get drunk
You dont understand. she was my french AND spanish teacher. that's 2 kinds of freaky. i have to find her on facebook.
dude. we need more in our fridge then just beer and applesauce.
I don't think it's considwred fine dining when you're passing out at golden palace in chinatown at 4 am with you boss who happens to be wearing a dress.
Nope, had to pee on the side got violated by tall grass. Then someone came around the corner and I had to stop mid pee to dive into the car.. Pants down
The walk of shame is a lot easier when I'm at a music festival and it's 12 feet from his tent to my tent
You are living the dream.
My card got declined when I tried to buy dippin dots at 2 am, the lady gave them to me for free because "I looked like I needed them."
You took the receipt and ate it. You then took it out and gave it to the waitress with slobber and holes all over it.
You can accomplish quite a bit with a can do attitude and a well placed ice cube.
hey can you come unlock the basement door? I'm trapped in here.
no I can't, you're a safety hazard. but, there's a beer keg down there somewhere. we don't have cups, but help yourself.
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