The best feeling....farting and having the bubble hit your balls
You know how my eyes change color? Well I noticed after I hook up with someone my eyes are greener.
Wow, so you're like the Edward Cullen of sluts.
It smells like wine and fried chicken. Im confused and intrigued.
No more tipping the bathroom attendant with your phone.
These 19 Guys Hit The Cougar Jackpot
My mom just set up beer pong in the dining room for family game night. and you ask why I'm still living at home.
He said in a slur "I go so hard, even when I..." and cut himself off by projectile vomiting all over the ice luge.
Is it possible to just pretend that everything we did after grilling up your goldfish didn't happen?
At some point i could of swore that you were in my bedroom riding a manatee last night..... I like my new dealer
Whoever owns the butter that i always steal out of the office fridge definitely put THC butter in there this time. Shit just got real.
35 Disappointing People Who Failed At Sexting
Life seems so much brighter and more vibrant after you have sex with a 20 year old. It's like how Kansas was in black and white and Oz was in technicolor.
he literally referred to his penis as the alaskan bull worm from spongebob. when can we get married
May or may not have just put tequila in my special "kids+" orange juice fortified with vitamins a, b, c, d, e, and now t.
It turned from Netflix and chill to cringeworthy YouTube videos and chill. At least he's honest.
He deserves a nobel prize for his dick-giving abilities. 10/10, would ride again.
What kind of friend would I be if I didn't make you hate things you once loved?