please pick me up with an explanation of why i shacked in a trailer with a guy who doesnt have a car.
I don't care if its bassically 3rd world. A country without a drinking age is a country without a drinking age.
i was surprised by the severity of his small dick condition
There was no way out of it, seeing as I left my photo ID right next to the vomit.
Your like the Mozart of blow jobs, you make every other girl seem like cheesy elevator music.
It's now 3:30 and the guy I went home with is showering me with shredded cheese. Nbd.
Haha its fine we ask know it. He's still cool thought
Focus on the keyboard man. Focusssss
I've got your keys and your panties. You can have one back. Your play honeybuns.
Sincerely. Thanks. You could have thought of anyone sitting on your face but you chose me. :)
And I just got smacked in the face by my cat. Apparently I'm supposed to be awake now.
I explained to him that me turning straight is a once a year thing. And this boy just happens to be the chosen one.
I touched a dick in church today
It's the Ides of March, motherfucker. That means we're supposed to daydrink, right?
How have you been? I haven’t talked to you since you dyed your pubes.
She really wants to put my dick in her mouth, and to be honest I really don't want to put it there.
Randomize
