Just saw 2 very young girls abandon baby buggys in the Xwalk to fight. Gotta love Holyoke.
I might get fired at work today. I had to prioritize. It's not my fault Cockasaurus came over.
sitting in an airport in detroit. just saw a commercial for detroit tourism with kid rock as a spokesman. reason # 1458 to never visit this city.
If I had a penis, I would stick it EVERYWHERE. I don't know what these guys are doing.
i mad aa ber float. budweiser nd ice creem. it amzig.
I was thrown in the air atleast 3 times by baby jesus
All I want is a camelback full of Jameson and the weather to be cool enough for me to wear rainbow spandex. Ugh. Pride problems.
Told her my spirit animal was the spread eagle. Now that's my name in her phone.
I look like a bag of dicks so if you could ugly yourself up that'd be great.
I was picked up from his hotel room at 5 a.m. and came home with my panties and jäger in a McDonald's bag so the desk attendant wouldn't judge me. This is what single at 25 is about.
I recall trading my iPhone watch for a carton of Marlboros.
I just gave them my two week notice. Now is the perfect time to fuck my boss's son
We were making fun of some people having sex on the beach, an hour later we were having sex on a golf course
Hahah I’ve never had someone stop me mid-coitus to tell me how amazing I am. Def ego boost.
She is beauty she is grace
she’s masturbsting in front of an open window while drunk af 9am
i thought you had class
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