the last thing i remember was trying to convince him to call over his girlfriend so we could have a threesome
Oddly enough when I decided to stop whoreing myself out... I lost most of my companionship.
he somehow instantly knew i was from vermont.
it probably had something to do with chasing your soco with maply syrup.
he thinks the dog can do a keg stand. i will let you know how it turns out
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He is now the second fuck buddy that i have met by walking up and grinding on him. My ass is so much more productive than dating
"The juvenile turned and faced the officer, unzipped his pants, placed a fresh cigarette in between his legs and preceded to light it with a match"
There's some muscle relaxers in my bedside table. Sorry if my dildo is in the bathroom.
like teasing for 28 minutes, then the very last 2 minutes is where is ALL goes down. I'm talking, rings off, stable sitting position, hand job madness.
He said I could liberate his beef and all I could think about was how I don't eat veal for political reasons.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
usual friday morning routine. the pants i wore last night are in my passenger seat and im rooting through the pockets trying to make exact change at the dunkin donuts drive thru
Whatever dude, just dont tell her your first impression was she looked like your cousin. no judgement here. just sayin.
I wish buying curtains was as easy as buying drugs. I already KNOW what I want and what the outcome will be: awesome.
Look, if I'm too lazy to put any effort into sexting, you better believe I'm too lazy to put any effort into dating.
Hey sorry about last night. can I come pick up my tooth?
We were having a serious discussion about Blue's Clues and I just kept thinking, 'you've seen me naked'.
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