I'm at some bar in brklyn... just made out with a guy named Owen.
He is a pre-school teacher... just sang me a song about weather.
Ok pretty sure I just saw Mike O'Malley walking through the parking lot. I wanted to see if I followed him, would he lead me to the acro-criag, i've always wanted a crack at that bitch.
He was dressed in cheap leather and smelled like death.
Dude I'm telling you, conditioner is the best for jerking it in the shower. It feels great and afterwards everything is all smooth
So, does it mean i'm loose if he can't even tell when he fell out?
morning after pill = breakfast in bed
Bad idea. College students cannot afford both alcohol and a cat. Unless said cat is irish, and can feed itself with fifths of whisky.
I feel like hell. The amount of black beans I found in my hair tells me I hit rock bottom
I fucked your brother... Hey, at least we know he is not gay... You're welcome.
he paid for dinner at the eiffel tower. drinks at a bar on the champs elysees. gave me a motorcycle ride back to his house, got us heineken and then took me to park overlooking paris. where he ate me out on a park bench. still have doubts about the french?
Softest bathroom rug I've slept on in my life, there have been many
I want to tell everyone I've ever met about how he him picking me up and fucking me against the wall was the highlight of my life. Worst lesbian ever.
Though I don't usually want to turn down ladies who want to liquify my clothing with their eyes, I made an exception.
I got home at 1 am on a weeknight with lube in my hair. I'd say it was a successful first date.
just said thank you to the lady who gave me a body search at the airport
Randomize
