Ok let me ask a question, does aderall make women less apt to have sex?
Cause it just destroys penises
Was that inappropriate? I can't gauge these things anymore
highlight from tonight: i hit on her and her mother.
You haven't had the true md experience until you've had your crotch grabbed by a drunk stripper with a snaggle tooth in front of your coworkers.
I am wearing two different shoes and just swallowed my gum. Wake the fuck up and bang the bartender already.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Dude there is a stripper at my door saying she has my birthday present. She knows my name...but it's not my birthday...
God works in mysterious ways my friend.
Omg how many tall cans is too many tall cans for 1 pm
I am going to tweet NASA until they put me into space
Those rocketship riding assholes need the common man
There is a video recording of my birth. I have seen it. It is terrifying.
She started throwing ice at me and started yelling, "Holy water bitches! This is an exorcism!"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
...and if you can get the necessary ingredients to make the Buffalo Chicken Melt, I will latch forever at your Teat of Justice.
My joke about liking my coffee like I like my men IS ABOUT TO COME TRUE.
THERE IS A BABY THAT ISN'T MINE THAT'S GOING TO HEAR ME BEING SEXED!
Once the overwhelming "oh god my crotch is on fire" wears off, that excite stuff is really nice
I just threw up on the way to class. Legit, on the sidewalk by psych building.
THAT WAS YOU? Psych prof just pointed out the window and said "that kids, is why you don't pregame before class"
I can always count on you to keep my boobs honest
Randomize